I recieve a few of these every week, so though I would reply to one and see how things go.  Below is the story so far

Start at the bottom and read up…. Im starting to get a little supicious as Gloria has yet to transfer the funds!!

Fw: You are recompensated!!

Sunday, 5 December, 2010 014:02

From:

This sender is DomainKeys verified

"matthew" <**************>

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To:

g.owen@un.org

Hi Gloria

Thank you for getting back to me.  I would hardly call an orange 12 foot orange penis nice times Gloria, but thank you for your compassion.  I have telephoned your colleague Timi and he said ‘’what’s the password?’’  I replied ‘’Fudge bandit’’ and he said this was not correct.  I explained that you had told me to ring him for my money and that this is now urgent as I am receiving significant pressure from the japanese sex toy supplier for payment having received my 14 pallets of anal butt plugs but he seemed disinterested Gloria.  In anger I called him a ‘’hairy flange fister’’, Im sorry Gloria but I was angry, and now he won’t answer the phone anymore.

Gloria I am now quite worried for my safety,  all butt plug suppliers in the UK are run by Triads and I really need my infected penis compensation as soon as possible so I can pay for my bum corks.  Is there any way you could send the cash by DHL?

I am prepared to settle for just $800,000.00 to get this resolved quickly.  I would even be prepared to offer you a discount on one of my premier ‘’Purple Bum Bandit’’ butt plugs if you can help moves things along.

I look forward to hearing from you soon Gloria, my safety depends on it, Im terrefied of being found dead with an 8incher up my fudge factory…. my only solace is the knowledge this is not a scam and you are a lovely genuine person.

Matthew

Fw: You are recompensated!!

Sunday, 5 December, 2010 13:10

From:

"Mrs Gloria Owen." <g.owen@un.org>

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undisclosed-recipients

Dear Matthew

Thank to your for this reply.  I am sorry to hear about your swellings and hope you are well soon to soon.  I am glad the recompensations will be pleasing for you and you have nice times in Nigeria.

Contacts are needed with my associate Mr. Timi Williams Phone:- +234 812 268 7882. Email:- ctm.williamsjr@gmail.com who will make an arrangements to transfers the funds.

Please to contact him this day.  Gloria Owen.

Fw: You are recompensated!!

Sunday, 5 December, 2010 09:24

From:

This sender is DomainKeys verified

"matthew" <**************>

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To:

g.owen@un.org

Dear Gloria,

Thank you so much for your electronic mailing letter, as you can imagine I am delighted to hear I may be entitled to compensation, my pert little man tits are tingling and my rusty sheriffs badge is twitching with excitement.

Although I have never been scammed by anyone from Nigeria as I am far to clever to fall victim to such shenanigans I did once take a romantic weekend break there in the late 1980’s and after using the toilet in my hotel I found I contracted a bacterial infection resulting in my penis turning orange, swelling to four times its normal size (almost 12 feet) and smelling of mushy peas.  I also found I could not speak for three days and was forced to communicate by making cat noises and blinking Morse code. 

Anyway, I got a little carried away when I received your email Gloria and have ordered £350,000.00 worth of anal sex toys from a japanese sex toy supplier so my hope is that my unfortunate penis infection incident in 1982 will still allow me to claim compensation, although perhaps a slight reduction to $850,000.00 would be a more reasonable sum.  Should you require any photographic evidence of my swollen helmet please let me know, I have several images I can send, one makes it look like an orange one eyed python.

I assume you will require my bank details and sort code so if you  could let me know where to send them.  I trust you Gloria…  you seem lovely and genuine, I look forward to hearing from you.

Matthew

You are recompensated!!

Saturday, 4 December, 2010 20:10

From:

"Mrs Gloria Owen." <g.owen@un.org>

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To:

undisclosed-recipients

Mrs. Gloria Owen. Head of African Affairs, United Nations African Affairs Office. 3 Whitehall Court London SW1A 2EL. Switchboard. United Kingdom. Attn: Beneficiary, Under the United Nations scam victims rehabilitation scheme you are listed and approved to receive payment of of US$950.000.00 as one of the scammed victims. Be guided therefore to get in touch with the country supervising payment officer in Nigeria ASAP via his given information so that he can release your funds to you as per our standing instruction. Name: – Mr. Timi Williams Phone:- +234 812 268 7882. Email:- ctm.williamsjr@gmail.com Notify us in writing as soon as you get paid of the above amount. Faithfully yours, Gloria Owen {Mrs}

Good stuff mate, very funny.

Just a word of warning Mat, this Gloria woman sounds like she's upto no good to me, just keep your eye on her and your wallet and your arse hole.

Post edited 23:04 – Dec 6th 2010 by antman

Oh mercy, thanks a lot Espedair, I've just spent the last 4 hours on that 419eater site.

It has to be one of the best reads I've had in a long time. Just the photos they get the scammers to take are amazing. My favourite so far is where the scammer photos himself with the sign "I LOVE FAGS" to try to impress a horny Gillian Anderson.

Edit:

No, no, no theres more. The first one I read, called "book worm" where he gets that African fella to read and record THE WHOLE of The Hitchikers Guide to the Galaxy, 9 hours in total, and email to Micheal Palin, who would then give him £9000.

Honestly people, check this site out, I'll link to the "best of" page here: (linky)

http://www.419eater.com/html/letters.htm

Post edited 08:33 – Dec 7th 2010 by AyselDK

Well, no reply from Gloria so I thought it was all over…. I sent her a pleading note yesterday just incase and then out of the blue shes back in touch this morning   Start at the bottom and read up again.  Looks like Im getting my $850,000.00 after all… phew.  The more calculator astute amongst you will note the old decimal spelling of Boobless in the account number.

Fw: You are recompensated!!

Tuesday, 7 December, 2010 08:22

From:

This sender is

DomainKeys verified

"matthew" <**************>

To:

g.owen@un.org

ctm.williamsjr@gmail.com

Dear Gloria and Mr Timi Williams Jr

Please find below my bank details which I trust you will keep confidential:

The Royal Bank of Clagnut (Chuffington-on-cradock branch)

Sort Code. 08-72-92

Account No. 80081355

Please confirm when the monies will be paid in

as the Pat ‘The Mullet Sugar Lips’ Sharp has commenced menacing telephone messages

threatening that I only have 26 hours left to pay for my poo flute packers or he will leave me gaping

live a wizard’s sleeve.  He's got a big hand Gloria…. and I don't think he's the type of man to use lubricant.

Kind Regards,

Matthew

Fw: You are recompensated!!

Tuesday, 7 December, 2010 07:21

From:

"Mrs Gloria Owen."

<g.owen@un.org>

To:

undisclosed-recipients

Dear Matthew

I am sorry for these delays.  My associate Timi ask that you provide contacts

detail of banks to his email address.  I am sorry

that you have problems with Timi before this but he now has you name available

from me.  Mr Keith and Mr Pat is not from

my agency and I advise to not have this advice or the transaction may be not

completed. Gloria Owen {Mrs}

Fw: You are recompensated!!

Monday, 6 December, 2010 11:02

From:

This sender is

DomainKeys verified

"matthew" <**************>

To:

g.owen@un.org

Dear Gloria

I write this email to you in a state of panic, shut away upstairs in

my hot water airing cupboard trembling in fear with warm shepherd’s pie running

down the back of my legs, Im a prisoner in my own home.  I have just

been visited by hit man Pat ''The Mullet Sugar Lips'' Sharp a representative of the Japanese sex toy supplier

demanding payment for my 14 pallets of bum corks.  Pat was clear that if the outstanding balance

was not paid in the next 48 hours I would be taken against my will to his ‘’Fun

House’’ and coco shunted!

I am worried I have had no further communication from you

Gloria…  I have contacted my solicitor,

Mr Keith Chegwin Esq who states that previously in an effort to speed up such

high value compensation payment events he has visited the payees home address

and shouted ‘’wake up you beggers its Cheggers’’ through a megaphone but as his legal practice is

based in Dagenham and you are in Nigeria this would be too costly.  Could you at least confirm my compensation is

on its way so I can make sure I am in to accept the boxes of cash.  I would recommend £50 notes in an effort to

keep the weight down.

Kind Regards

Matthew

That really is one for the 419 eaters.